How many times have you heard that?  As excerpted from a great article by Shane Kreider, you probably have heard that expression a lot.  And guess what, “From a financial viewpoint, it means our money has to last ten years longer, but we also have ten extra years to make it. It also means we have ten extra years to apply our entrepreneurial skills to make us happy.”

According to Shane, “The expression also has a scientific explanation. It’s a different way of looking at age - it’s not how long you’ve lived, it’s how long you’ve got left. As our expected life span gets longer, ‘middle age’ happens later; some say we are therefore in the same cycle of life at 40 that our parents were in at 30. And as our life span is supposed to continue to increase, middle age is coming later and later. Expected life span is different from country to country but in Germany, for example, scientists say that by 2050, middle age (for Germans) will begin around age 52.”

And there is also a great way to look at this and that is about the attitude you have.  Many of us refuse to buy into the idea of “getting older”.  I personally feel the same way now as I did at 30.  Maybe there are some bones cracking more often, but in my mind, I am 30.  I have another 50 years at least, to learn, grow, prosper and excel in all my life areas. 

So as Shane says, “If you get out of bed some mornings feeling old, remember this: scientifically speaking, you’re actually ten years younger. Then have a good day.”

Steps 5 - Be Optimistic

…CERTAINTY DOES!

So that’s what Daniel Gilbert said last week in Thursday’s Op-Ed section of the New York Times. Well, at first that was a mind blower for me, but when I thought more about it, it actually made a great deal of sense.Daniel backed up his article with a lot of good research. He started by reminding us of Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s famous line, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” during the Great Depression. And then he went on to say how psychologists and economists have conducted extensive research to show that the very rich are generally no happier than 99% of us. That is, of course, if you are not in the breadlines and worrying where your next meal is coming from. That is something else.

He then gives a number of examples of how the issue of “uncertainty” is what really makes people fearful. It is the anxiety of “not knowing” what is happening next that throws people into fear and depression. Think about it.

Daniel shared an experiment done by researchers in the Netherlands who gave subjects a series of 20 shocks. One group knew that they were going to get 20 intense shocks. The other group was going to get 20 shocks as well, but 17 were going to be mild and the other 3 were going to be intense. They just didn’t know WHEN they were going to get those intense shocks. The result was that the second group sweated more and had much more anxiety than the first group who knew they were always getting those intense shocks. The reason was this – people feel worse when something bad might occur than then something bad will occur.

So is he saying that we feel better when we know the truth rather than wondering about what might happen? And the answer is yes. Rather than waiting, in anxious anticipation, we would rather get the news, cry for a while, and then get on with doing whatever needs to happen next.

So how does that apply to Massive Abundance? Once we know the demon – in this case, uncertainty, then we can look forward to the outcome of what it is that concerns you, and know that we will be able to make the best of it, some way, some how.

Face your fears squarely, know that the right answers will come, and that you will be able to handle whatever comes in your path. That is Massive Abundance!

STEP 5 – BE OPTIMISTIC

Do some of your fears scare the hell out of you? Are you freaked out by speaking in public, flying in airplanes or even work deadlines? As crazy as this sounds, fear is good for all of us. Fear is generated by the brain to motivate us. We WANT to be motivated by fear because this causes us to act. If we didn’t have fear, we would be running red lights with abandon.

The key is, how can we use and channel our fear to motivate us in all life areas? How do we use our crazy fears to push us, motivate us and get us to make our lives better? Yes, we want to push through our fears and stop letting them hold us back. I am personally fearful of enclosed places with a lot of people. But do I let this fear keep me from flying on airplanes? NO! I have used some techniques and breathing and other things to get my butt on that plane.

One technique we discuss a lot in our seminars is the use of Kaizen. Kaizen is the theory of a journey of 1,000 miles begins with the first step. It is taking baby steps toward a goal when you know there is a great fear holding you back. By taking small steps toward cutting out sugar from your diet or eating smaller portions, for example, it circumvents the fear factor in the brain to maybe reduce the sugar in your ice tea from 2 teaspoons to 1 and half teaspoons for a week. Reducing the sugar incrementally isn’t as fearful as cutting it out all together. If you can take these small steps in any area you want to change, then you’ll be more confident and more motivated to take bigger steps. And it is through these bigger steps that we all achieve breakthroughs! So you use you fear to motivate you to Massive Abundant things in your life!

Step 2; Activate Your Vision

…and it can change your life in dramatic ways!

No, it’s not those expletives you shout when things don’t turn out your way – when life spits out a situation that you hadn’t asked for. When your auto dealership gets closed, when that pink slip is yours, or when you don’t qualify for that home loan.

But it is a word that can turn all those bad words and thoughts into better ones. That word is HOPE. If your life is filled with uncertainty, allow for the possibility that things will get better.

How to get started? Maybe you start small. Pick an area where you can make progress right away and you can tackle the more difficult tasks later on.

Worried about your finances? OK. Make a list of all your expenses. Then, look at your income and see where you need to make changes. Think “Swiss cheese.” Poke enough holes; eventually you will get through the cheese.

This simple, little 4-letter word can turn your life from upside down to upside UP. It can pull you out of darkness and help you to stand in the light.

STEP 3 – MAKE ROOM FOR THE MAGIC

Want to ruin every relationship you have? Then just play fair.
Dr. Henry Cloud, a well known author and psychologist, claims that this idea is absolutely critical to all types of partnerships – business, marriages, etc. Here’s how it works:

Let’s say that you and your spouse go to counseling because you just don’t get along. You are fighting all the time and nothing gets resolved. You both believe in “tit for tat”. If you are nice to me, I will be nice to you. If you say something mean to me, then I will say something mean to you. If you say you love me, then I will say I love you too. Sound familiar? Well, this works fine until the communication breaks down, then nothing gets resolved.

So here is what you can do. Just GIVE MORE! Suppose you are sick and tired of always being the mature one. It’s time that he steps up to the plate. You have spent the last 6 weeks always being nice and because you have been nice, he’s been nice as well. Then something goes haywire, and he blows up. And then you blow up as well, since he broke the “being nice” contract. Then you are off to the races again.

Since you might be the more mature one – in this instance – then the responsibility is on you to give more. It is not about who is right or wrong, it is about getting the relationship to a higher level where you can get issues resolved and you can move forward.

Ask yourself what can be done to fix this? How can we improve that? Get beyond your own need. There may be a time when you aren’t able to be at that level and your partner might step in. Unmet needs create frustration, and if both parties have unmet needs simultaneously, then nothing gets resolved.

Sometimes we like “tit for tat” because it implies predictability in relationships. But that is really codependent and can lead to disastrous results. Instead of doing what you might normally do in responding – blame, argue, point fingers – do the opposite. Don’t withdraw, get closer. Don’t disagree, agree. Before you know it, the issue will go away and the two of you can move on to a more healthy, interdependent relationship.

Step 7 – Give Back